A young engaged couple asked: “Many today think
that life-long fidelity is too challenging; many feel that the struggle to live
together may be beautiful, enchanting, but it is difficult, even impossible. We
ask you for a word to enlighten us on this”. Response:
I thank you for the question. Let me explain to you: they sent me these questions ahead
of time... you know... and so I was able to reflect and think of an answer that
is a little more solid.
It’s important to ask
yourself if it is possible to love each other “forever”. This is a question
that must be asked: Is it possible to love “forever”? Today so many people are
afraid of making definitive decisions.
One boy said to his mother: “I want to
become a sportsman, but only for ten years”. He was afraid of a definitive choice.
But that is a general fear that comes from our culture. To make life decisions
seems impossible. Today everything changes so quickly, nothing lasts long. And
this mentality leads many who are preparing for marriage to say: “we are
together as long as the love lasts”, and then? All the best and see you
later... and so ends the marriage.
But what do we mean by “love”? Is it only a
feeling, a psychophysical state? Certainly, if that is it, then we cannot build
on anything solid. But if, instead, love is a relationship, then it is a
reality that grows, and we can also say by way of example that it is built up
like a home. And a home is built together, not alone! To build something here
means to foster and aid growth.
Dear engaged couples, you are preparing to grow
together, to build this home, to live together forever. You do not want to
found it on the sand of sentiments, which come and go, but on the rock of true
love, the love that comes from God. The family is born from this plan of love,
it wants to grow just as a home is built, as a place of affection, of help, of
hope, of support. As the love of God is stable and forever, so too should we
want the love on which a family is based to be stable and forever. Please, we
mustn’t let ourselves be overcome by the “culture of the provisory”! Today this
culture invades us all, this culture of the temporary. This is not right!
How, then, does one cure
this fear of the “forever”?
One cures it day by day, by entrusting oneself to
the Lord Jesus in a life that becomes a daily spiritual journey, made in steps
— little steps, steps of shared growth — it is accomplished through a
commitment to becoming men and women who are mature in faith.
Dear engaged
couples, “forever” is not only a question of duration! A marriage is not
successful just because it endures; quality is important. To stay together and
to know how to love one another forever is the challenge for Christian couples.
What comes to mind is the miracle of the multiplication of the loaves: for you
too, the Lord can multiply your love and give it to you fresh and good each
day. He has an infinite reserve! He gives you the love that stands at the
foundation of your union and each day he renews and strengthens it. And he
makes it ever greater when the family grows with children.
On this journey
prayer is important, it is necessary, always: he for her, she for him and both
together. Ask Jesus to multiply your love. In the prayer of the Our Father we
say: “Give us this day our daily bread”. Spouses can also learn to pray like
this: “Lord, give us this day our daily love”, for the daily love of spouses is
bread, the true bread of the soul, what sustains them in going forward.
This
is the prayer for engaged couples and spouses. Teach us to love one another, to
will good to the other! The more you trust in him, the more your love will be
“forever”, able to be renewed, and it will conquer every difficulty.
Questions and Comments are appreciated.
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Anyway,I read the series on fear of forever.it is an interesting topic that focuses on relationships and marriages.and something caught my attention-is it possible to love forever? This is relative to me because forever depends togetherness-working hand in hand and soul to soul to keep the relationship solid and rocky. And also looking onto God together. It just works well when someone needs you in their lives as much as you need them. That mutual thing.
ReplyDeleteAs a guy, i can be skeptical. One just needs to trust God to direct our steps and look out for the right things as we decide to settle dowm
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