Fear is a perfectly normal and healthy emotion
that is essential to your survival.
It protects from danger and can even be
helpful in certain situations if “used” wisely.
Unfortunately, fear and anxiety, in
overwhelming, sustained doses, can be absolutely paralyzing. These two emotions
can hijack your thoughts, stress your soul and make you want to shut down and
withdraw from life.
As you look back on your life, how many times
were your fears irrational and unwarranted? How many times did they exceed any
“real” danger posed by the object or situation?
If left unaddressed, fear creates dangerous
levels of stress and causes significant problems in your relationships and
work.
Coping with
Paralyzing Fear and Anxiety
1. Name Your
Fears
People become afraid and overwhelmed with
worry when they feel out of control; flooded with uncertainty, they worry about
what will happen to them and their family.
They begin imagining the worst and start
making up scenarios and scary situations. Unfortunately, these self-created
scenarios tend to be more catastrophic than what eventually happens (if
anything even happens at all).
To break fear’s hold on you, name it. Start by
asking and answering, “What am I really afraid of?” This drags fear from your
imagination into reality. Acknowledging and articulating your true fears makes
fear less threatening and more manageable.
It’s been said over and over again that FEAR
is False Evidence Appearing Real. Okay. So let’s get to the truth of the
matter. And that starts by you asking yourself some questions. Deal with facts
not fiction because the truth shall set you free. Don’t be a prisoner in some
imaginary jail.
2. Replace
Fearful Thoughts with Positive Ones
Many of us are prone to negative self-talk. We
are constantly scaring ourselves with fearful thoughts and imagined outcomes
that make reality feel a lot worse than it actually is.
To free yourself from paralyzing fear, you
must identify the thoughts and self-talk that make you feel anxious, afraid and
stuck, and then start replacing them with positive alternatives.
Choose to remind yourself of the facts. Choose to challenge fearful thoughts with
positive, fearless statements. For instance, replace the thought of “What if I
fail?” with “What if I succeed?” This simple shift of focus will lead you in a
healthier direction that takes you to a much better place in your life.
3. Go Into
Action
Action is the best cure for paralyzing fear
and anxiety!
Focus on the present and figure out what you
need to do right now.
Figure out what the next step is and DO it as
this creates the motivation you seek.
When the end goal seems insurmountable and
overwhelming, making you feel afraid and stressed, choose to see what lies
beyond the mountainous, seemingly unconquerable obstacle.
You can choose to gaze at defeat – on the
overwhelming thing that’s stopping you… or you may choose to focus on the
victory – to life beyond the obstacle.
Focus on the positive outcome – on all of the
great things that will result from you conquering the fearful giant that’s
paralyzing you and filling your heart with terror. And then break down
the end goal into small, manageable tasks. This builds confidence and creates
sustainable momentum. Empowerment isn’t something someone gives you, it’s what
you give yourself. So why wait for someone to remove your fear(s) when you can
start slaying your giants right now?
4. Talk to a
Professional
Talking to a therapist might make it easier to
sort things out and pinpoint your fear(s). A good therapist not only listens
but helps design an action plan for overcoming your fears. This is especially
important if your fear has begun interfering significantly with daily life
and/or has crossed over into phobia territory.
A healthy dose of anxiety and fear is good for
you!
Fear keeps you from hurting yourself (or
others) and can be a catalyst for change.
However, keep fear on a short leash to make
sure it remains proportional to the situation at hand. You can do this by
acknowledging and articulating it and then replacing it with the facts,
positive thoughts and outcomes, and working your action plan.
Don’t let fear control you.
Tame it once and for all.
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